594 Hilary DeCesare:

In every life comes a time for reinvention. Sometimes what was working great in your life or business… …simply stops working. We can be victims or we can seize our power to change and grow.

MELINDA

I’m Melinda Wittstock and today on Wings of Inspired Business we meet an inspiring entrepreneur who has made it her commitment to help women fire up possibilities mid-life, taking a time most try to bypass and instead turn it into a time to focus on inspiring business ventures, clarity in relationships, and the inner aha that you are ultimately the creator of your own purpose aligned lifestyle and the life you want to live.

Hilary DeCesare is an award-winning entrepreneur, Transformational Coach, CEO of The ReLaunch Co., featured speaker in the Silicon Valley and conferences nationwide, as well as a relentless philanthropist.

I can’t wait to introduce you to Hilary! First…

Hilary DeCesare says your success in manifesting your dreams starts in your heart, moves to your head, and to your higher self. And when a woman in a power role, as a CEO and entrepreneur, isn’t working with all three, it leads to unhappiness, burnout, and failure.

Here’s the thing: Failure is part of the curriculum of entrepreneurship, and inevitable and necessary part of our growth as we continue to “relaunch” our lives as we learn, adapt to fast-changing circumstances, and step into our true inner power.

Transformational Coach, CEO of The ReLaunch Co., featured speaker in the Silicon Valley and a relentless philanthropist, Hilary has leveraged her own setbacks in life to create a unique foundational process called The ReLaunch Effect and The Make Money Method. Today she shares the step by step plan to go from stuck on autopilot to transformation as a powerhouse of possibility in every area of your life.

Let’s put on our wings with the inspiring Hilary DeCesare.

Melinda Wittstock:         Hilary, welcome to Wings.

Hilary DeCesare:               Melinda, it is outstanding to be here finally with you.

Melinda Wittstock:         I know, right? I’ve been waiting to talk to you for a long time. I love what you do, Hilary, around reinvention, in fact, you help people relaunch their lives. And let’s face it, we all have to relaunch a number of times in our lives.

Hilary DeCesare:               No doubt. I mean, at this point, when I talk to people and I walk them through, let’s talk about some of the most significant relaunches that somebody can have. They literally can start, when you’re in your teens. They can go into your 20s, your 30s, your 40s. And we’re talking like all the way up, 60s, 70s. You’ve got business changes, you’ve got career, you’ve got divorces, you’ve got relationships, you’ve got personal development, you’ve got health. I mean, multitude of relaunches. And what we really try to do is get you to reimagine what you really want in whatever is your next chapter. Whether you’re in the mid zone and you’re kind of looking at the second half of having your life be better than the first. Whether you’re in your second chapter, your third chapter, whatever it is, we want to make sure that, life is short. We know that, right? We want to make sure that we are getting the max velocity out of everything, every area of our life, which would include your personal life, your relationships, and your business.

Melinda Wittstock:         I think for women in particular, we go through these seasons, who we’re being in our 20s, as opposed to our 30s, say when we’re having kids, and then getting into the 40s, where you’re like, wait, what, all the ways perhaps you compromised or lived the life you thought you should live as opposed to the one that was truly in your soul and in your heart. You sort of get into wait a minute, I really want to reinvent and just be 100% who I am. I see this a lot in women into their 40s and into their 50s in particular. What are some of the things that you see where women in that particular mid I guess, I hate using this phrase middle age.

Hilary DeCesare:               We call it the mid zone girl.

Melinda Wittstock:         Because I’m firmly in the mid zone. I like that better.

Hilary DeCesare:               Same with me.

Melinda Wittstock:         Okay, so the mid zone. What are some of the factors that you see women waking up and saying, wait a minute, this isn’t what I thought it would be, or this isn’t really, I got to this destination but I’m actually not happy. What are some of the things that you’re seeing there where women need the most help at that particular mid zone stage?

Hilary DeCesare:               So what’s happened especially in the last 12 months, is that we all have had a rude awakening. And I literally call it a rude awakening because we all are having the ability to wake up after this year of whatever it was to you. But everyone again, has had some form of a relaunch literally. I can’t think of one person that I have spoken to when I have been out on large virtual stages that hasn’t had some form of a relaunch. And so, the rude part, the rude is like, wait a second, maybe I’m not really where I should be at this point in my life. And this is usually what happens to us when we hit that mid zone. And instead of having like a midlife crisis, I would prefer to have everyone have a mid zone relaunch.

And when you start talking about that, the things that happen to us at this age are usually we are reassessing our relationships, we’re reassessing where we are in terms of our businesses, or wanting to start something new. Or we’re reassessing the fact of like, who am I, and what am I really supposed to be doing? And there’s been this concept since for years where these really large gurus are saying, love yourself, love your life, love your business, love, love, love, love, love. And yes, I am the ultimate proponent of love. But the problem is so many people don’t like themselves. So how do you expect them to jump from, yeah, I’m not that crazy about myself right now to I love everything about it. It’s a tough leap.

So what we’ve done is we have created something called the relaunch effect. And why did I do it? Because I’ve been through cancer, I’ve lost my mom suddenly, I’ve had kids with major health issues. I’ve had the worst of worst of things happen in my business where there was a gentleman on my board who ended up doing a Ponzi scheme who went to federal prison.

Melinda Wittstock:         Oh my God. My heart goes out to you. That was a long list.

Hilary DeCesare:               It’s been a rough and rocky road, but at the same time, I can tell you, I’ve never been happier where I am. And the reason being is that every time I’ve had a relaunch, whether it was a mini relaunch or whether it was a mega relaunch, I’ve always gone back to the relaunch effect, the seven steps. And for so long, I didn’t even realize I was doing it, I was just naturally going back to, all right, here’s what I’m going to do, here’s how I’m going to face adversity.

And there was something that I really wanted to make sure that your audience can really take away from our conversation. And it’s when things start to happen and you fall into that trigger, where it’s like, it’s going, it’s happening again, it usually stems from something, and we’ve all heard about limiting beliefs. We’ve all heard about things that happen when childhood and how do we avoid those. You can’t just patch up the foundation, just throw some sticky stuff in there and hope everything lasts and it’s okay in the future. You have to go at it.

I call these limiting beliefs BUGS, these beliefs under ground surfacing, B-U-G-S, beliefs under ground surfacing. And part of what I have come to realize, whether it’s when I’m working with clients one on one or in my group coaching, I find that when you’re going through your relaunches or when you’re kind of at bay, and things are kind of okay right now and you’re waiting for the next shoe to drop, you’re like, when’s it going to happen, I know it’s going to happen, it’s going to happen, it’s going to happen. A lot of times these BUGS are below the surface. And then something happens and damn, they start to show their evil heads.

And so, this is this is where women are with, okay, I know it’s there. We know, right? We know when we start feeling imposter syndrome, we know I’m not good enough, is my company going to be able to make it. Am I going to be able to give my investors back their return? Am I, am I, am I, all these things. And that voice in your head, that like you can’t do it. This is like, why do you think you can do it. And that’s the ego talking. And so, what we want to do is say, you know what, we’re going to squash those bugs so that we can actually go on with our business in creating the lifestyle we want.

Melinda Wittstock:         I love that. I love the BUGS, beliefs under ground surfacing, because we are what we think. We are what we feel. We have all these stories that we built up millions of them, all the way through our lives. Gosh, so so many. And the thing that I’ve learned is when those bugs come to the surface, it’s actually a wonderful opportunity because it shows you what you’ve been thinking, and it allows you the conscious moment in that case to say, well, actually, I’m going to think something different. I don’t have to think this. This isn’t actually me, it’s just a story about me. And I can change the story.

Hilary DeCesare:               So what we have done is, how about this, I want to give you the five simple steps, simple, how about that? Because everywhere we go it’s like, oh my gosh.

Melinda Wittstock:         I like simple.

Hilary DeCesare:               Yeah, this is going to be hard, it’s going to be long, it’s going to be endless therapy, it’s going to be well through extensive, and I’ve been studying psychology for years, I have a degree in it, I have a degree now in a bunch of other different things that all have to do with really getting to the bottom of this. So, when you think of these things and they come up, I want you to be able to identify it. Just notice it. And we have five steps, the first is release, the second is rewrite, the third is reframe, the fourth is rewire and restart. And it’s all under belief blasters. Release, rewrite, reframe, rewire, restart.

Bottom line is, know it’s there, accept it’s there. No judgment, no good, no bad. It’s just there. It’s a belief. And you literally write it down on a piece of paper, you write it all down, like, this is what I’m thinking. I’ve seen it numerous times in my life. It keeps coming up, you just write it down. Then the way you rewrite it is flip the script. Flip it into something positive, flip it into the opposite of what you’re thinking. And then think about where in your life have you actually had evidence that all right, when you think about, like, I can’t do this, I’ve never been able to run a seven figure business. And all of a sudden, you’re like, yeah, but you know what, I was able to do this in my business and this in my business and this in my business. And all of a sudden you realize like, I can do it. I do have the ability to have success.

And then you look at reframing it from this whole perspective of getting into the mind, your mind, and writing out your future story of what you really want. And then rewire, this is the best part. Have you heard of the app, and I have nothing to do with it, it’s called Think Up, Think Up it’s an app. You can record your own affirmations. You can record what we’ve already rewritten. And once you start to create those neuro-transmitters that are starting to fire, we want you to be doing this. It takes almost 67 days for your brain to rewire itself. And so, you want to get going with this Think app, and you record your new affirmation. And what’s an affirmation? An affirmation is literally what you want to be thinking, what you want to be believing. And yeah, at the beginning, it might be a little bit like, this is a bunch of BS. But then it starts to change.

Melinda Wittstock:         Yeah, because you can start to have those kind of, I call them counter intentions, where you say something that you want. I am this or I am attracting X or Y into my life and this positive thing. But then mean girl kind of voice comes in.

Hilary DeCesare:               That’s your ego, baby.

Melinda Wittstock:         And it says, wait a minute, what makes you think you can, so many people have that kind of inner bully voice. You wouldn’t allow your own worst enemy to talk to you the way that voice-

Hilary DeCesare:               And I can tell you, so true, you would never do that, you would never. And so, one of the things in the rewire, in that stage, I’ll give you one more little tip on that, is that you actually write a letter, not that you’re going to send a letter, but you write a letter to the person that you think that belief actually stemmed from. Where do you think you learned it? And you release it for them. I understand that this was your belief, but this isn’t my belief. And I’m releasing it right now, I don’t want it anymore. But I can understand how that is how you thought about it.

And I got to tell you, and again, you’re not going to send it, and then you write the response from them, it is impactful. I have seen people like, the tears flowing, I’m getting chills right now because I just did one of these yesterday. I mean, it’s life changing when you realize it’s not my story, it’s yours. And I don’t want [inaudible 00:13:55] anymore.

Melinda Wittstock:         Oh, gosh, that’s so true. Bottom line, it moves you out of any kind of victimhood. Victimhood where we lost our power. Gave our power away to the person or the situation or the circumstance that made us feel like a victim and powerless to claim that back.

It’s almost like taking a responsibility, or I guess the better way of phrasing it, is when you do that inner work on yourself and you let these things go in this powerful way that you suggest, when you let them go, you’re actually liberating the other person too.

Hilary DeCesare:               So true.

Melinda Wittstock:         [inaudible 00:14:56] your own power back, and you’re changing what’s going to manifest around you.

Hilary DeCesare:               That is so spot on when you think about you, we talked about this, you have the choice to be either in that victim mentality of shame and blame, or you can take on the victor. So it’s a victor-victim type of approach, and you can take on the victor which is, I’m taking 100% responsibility for me, for my finances, for my relationships, for my business. No more of that victim blame, shame. It’s all about this happened because of them. No. Soon as you take 100% responsibility for your own actions, your own world, everything that is happening around you, it’s that whole idea of things happen for you, not to you, then when you accept that all right, these limiting beliefs are actually sabotaging me, they’re actually putting me into that victim state, that’s when people are like, all right, give me that formula again. Let me find out about the belief blasters.

And then i get the comment of like okay, Hilary, now I’ve just realized that I got a lot of limiting beliefs. I mean, is that normal? And it’s like, yeah, we do. And by the way, I’ve been doing this a long time, I still have things come up. I’m still going through my own belief blasters.

Melinda Wittstock:         Yeah, we all are. I mean, that’s the other thing, it’s a journey not a destination. It’s something that I’ve learned I think through the therapy that just is part of the program when you’re an entrepreneur, because you get challenged all the time, everything’s changing around you. There are people in situations you can’t control, there are some you can, but it’s constant learning. And you’re failing forward, you’re testing hypotheses. There’s so many opportunities for these I guess underlying fears or limitations or areas where we don’t value ourselves enough to really be challenged in the circumstances that present themselves to us.

I’ve just come over the years to see all those things as oh goody, there’s something else that I can clear out because it is a journey and it’s about enjoying the journey in the present moment, not assuming that the happiness is going to come when we hit a milestone or a number in our bank account or a certain pair of shoes, whatever it is. That it’s really when we’re really enjoying that process and coming to terms with it and accepting ourselves in that process, and knowing that it’s always, it never stops. And we can reach peace with that. That moment, where people get to that point of kind of conscious or sort of acceptance awareness, magic starts to happen. I’m a witness to that I guess in my own life. It’s been very true in my own journey. It’s so  funny when you look back and you said really, I was like okay, all right.

Hilary DeCesare:               Isn’t that so true. The fact that my podcast is called The Silver Lined Relaunch. And even last night, I was talking with my husband, and this is my second marriage, just my soulmate and I’m just so ridiculously blessed that-

Melinda Wittstock:         Wonderful.

Hilary DeCesare:               Well, it is. I can’t remember if [inaudible 00:18:38], that was another situation that happened. I went through a divorce with three little kids and everything. Here’s the thing, you mentioned something really interesting, and it’s that fail forward. In the ReLaunch Co, there’s a philosophy that we have. When you fall forward, you fail forward. Where do you end up? If you really were to fall forward and fail forward, you’re going to end up with your face on the ground. I don’t want that. I don’t want that for you, I don’t want that for myself, I don’t want-

Melinda Wittstock:         Painful.

Hilary DeCesare:               Yeah, it’s painful. Instead, our approach at the ReLaunch Co is you need to relaunch and fail up. You’re talking about like a rocket, you’re on a launch pad, this is the launch pad of life. And yeah, things are going to come out of left field, things are going to knock you over. But I want you and everyone listening to be thinking that as you fail up, you’re also getting that more solid launchpad, you’re developing it, you’re creating it. And that’s what will take you to that next level of success. So it’s great.

I’m constantly telling the folks in our company like, okay, what did you fail at this week? Great. This is standing because we now know that, we’re not going to go through that again. And we’ve learned, and we’ve had this awesome okay. It’s an epiphany. In the army, they do this AAR, the after action review. And it’s like, okay, tell me what you learned. Great. And now let’s move on.

So everyone out there, stop thinking about failing forward. None of us wants to have a bloody nose on the way down.

Melinda Wittstock:         The face plant.

Hilary DeCesare:               Yeah, we don’t want that. We [inaudible 00:20:42] imagine that awesome, awesome image in your head. You’re on top of the mountain, you’ve got your hands up. That’s what I want to say.

Melinda Wittstock:         Well, I love fail up. I mean, how perfect a way to describe it in the context of a podcast called Wings.

Hilary DeCesare:               It’s perfect.

Melinda Wittstock:         We’re literally lifting ourselves up. And so, I find those moments, and depending on what kind of entrepreneur you are, there are a lot of entrepreneurs that create great businesses. There are other entrepreneurs that go out and innovate something out of whole cloth. It’s just something that’s never been thought of before or whatever. In that latter context, but in all contexts, they’re always going to be, it’s all hypothesis until it’s not right. So inherently, you’re just going to be learning along the way.

I think just even as a CEO inspiring a team, for all the people out there who say, yes, our culture is one of innovation, well, if it’s one of innovation, you have to allow people to fail, you have to celebrate them for that as long as they’re learning, and allow that culture to really kind of take place, because otherwise you have a whole bunch of people on your team who are afraid to take risks and are going to be more contracted and saying no rather than trying different things or really following their bliss and their imagination and their true creative power. So it plays out at all aspects of an organization, both from the CEO and the founder through to how to inculcate that culture I guess in your team.

Something that’s very top of mind for me is we scale our team really quickly, and really walking our talk on that kind of innovation piece.

Hilary DeCesare:               This is so prevalent right now in businesses, and I’m sure that you along with everyone listening has been hearing, there’s so much about be, do, have. Be the person, do the things that you need to do, and you will have the outcome. But here’s the thing, when you operate under that in your business, then you have it and it’s almost like this, okay, I have it, we did what we said we were going to do. Instead, change it up and go be, do, ignite. Because what you want to be doing is business is about growth, business is about revenue, business is about creation. And being able to have your people in your business, have that feeling of that fire in your belly, I’m a part of this, I’m igniting something. It’s not just about having it, it’s about where do we take it from here.

And if they are constantly worried about, oh, my God, if this doesn’t work, we didn’t hit our number, we didn’t bring on as much as we thought, then it defeats what they’re ultimately going for. And there was an interesting Clubhouse I was listening to the other day, and this gentleman said, he puts out there I think he said 99 goals for the year. And he said, if I hit 50, I’m excited because that’s 50 more than I would have.

Melinda Wittstock:         God, even if he hits three.

Hilary DeCesare:               It was like, versus not doing it. I’m like, God, I love that. That’s so good. That’s the ignite.

Melinda Wittstock:         So a lot of it’s going into action. So there’s the inspiration, there’s all of that. There’s all the folks who, after the secret came out and were getting their heads around the law of attraction, and understood that kind of intellectually, conceptually and whatnot. Started doing vision boards, starting to do all these things, which is great. There’s that aspect of going into action.

Hilary DeCesare:               Totally. 100%.

Melinda Wittstock:         Going into action with it in the right creative mindset without hopefully all the baggage of all the old stories or all the I guess counter intentions, right?

Hilary DeCesare:               Well, and as you’re saying, yeah. You can’t have a thought that’s positive and negative at the same time.

Melinda Wittstock:         It’s a dissonance.

Hilary DeCesare:               Cognitive dissonance. Yes, you can’t do it.

Melinda Wittstock:         Stressful.

Hilary DeCesare:               It’s almost like, you had mentioned about, I mentioned my husband, and last night, we ended up talking about, isn’t it interesting that if I had veered right instead of left at any of the junctions where I thought it was this is the worst thing that could have ever happened to me, oh my God, am I ever going to recover? If I had chosen something else, I would not have met him, because it was during a time where I was out raising money for one of my companies. And I remember thinking there was an opportunity for an acquisition. It was when I had two co-founders. And I decided not to go with the acquisition. And you know how some people are like, oh my God, that was the worst decision ever. But hindsight, if I had taken it, I wouldn’t have done the next step, and I wouldn’t have been where I was when I met my husband, because it was around another company I was raising money for.

So very, very interesting how it is the silver linings that come from what we actually go through. And it builds us but it also creates where you are today. And I’m sure Melinda, with what you’ve created, I mean, my gosh, your story, what you have done, what you are now doing in terms of raising money and taking this to the next step. There were probably a lot of relaunches along the way that if you had taken a different approach, you would not be where you are today.

Melinda Wittstock:         Exactly. So then you can be grateful for those moments.

Hilary DeCesare:               No doubt.

Melinda Wittstock:         Right? Because you think at any given time, you have a multiplicity of decisions you could make. Just like which way you drive to, not the office anymore I guess, but the supermarket or something, can have an impact on your life. In terms of who you’re meeting, which conversation you have, what do you show up to? Which Clubhouse did you show up to? It’s overwhelming. This speaks to the need to know actually what you want and be in alignment with your true purpose.

So a lot of people talk about their true purpose. And some people really know what that is, and other people think they know, but it might be influenced by all the should’s in their life, so they’re living a life of obligation or should or people pleasing. And other people just literally don’t know. So at these junctures of relaunch, Hilary, how do you help people kind of really figure out what is their purpose? How can they get into that alignment?

Hilary DeCesare:               Oh, God, and I got to tell you, mid-zoners, hey, this is one of the hardest parts about trying to officially have a successful relaunch, because when you think about the law of Dharma and the universal law of what is expected from you down deep inside of you. And when we run into the feelings of I’m not good enough, I’m not where I should be at this point in my life, I’m not making enough money, I don’t have the family life that I always thought I would. That’s when we start beating ourselves up, and we start to chase, we’re chasing the dream. And as soon as you start to chase and you go from that lack scarcity, you don’t end up getting what you ultimately want because you’re not even aware of when you get it, that you’re like, I’m there, I just did what I wanted to do.

I can give you a great example. I’m coaching a gentleman who sold his business for 250 million, but his marital life was suffering significantly. His three children weren’t talking to him anymore. And we started working together. And he’s like, “I thought that this is what I wanted. I thought that as soon as I got this, I would be in that place.” And after working together, we realized that his journey, it wasn’t the money, yet he thought it was the money. It was something so much deeper. He wanted to serve, he wanted to give back.

And I think that one of the things that you can do right away is as soon as you can have some element in your life of being able to serve others, whether it is signing up for being a mentor or whether it is going down to the local whatever it is in donating your time, as soon as you start to have that appreciation for, you are here to have a higher purpose, it actually frees you up to start having space for more of that, because what you focus on grows. And then you can gain, and you mentioned this earlier, clarity around what do you really love to do. And it doesn’t matter what type of volunteer or what type of service you’re doing because once you start that, then more of that comes to you, more openings, more awareness of like oh, I could also do this. But you got to take that first step, and I know everyone listening is like I’m so busy, I got all this going on.

But I got to tell you, if you are literally at the point right now where you’re like maybe I should start a new business, maybe I should get out of the corporate world, maybe this side hustle or this little hobby that I have it’s something I’m really passionate about, that’s when it’s time to explore it because that voice in your head is trying so desperately to get you on the path, but the noise in your head isn’t allowing you to hear it. So, those would be my first couple of ideas that first and foremost, understand that when you start to give, you get. Law of reciprocity. And that helps you get to where you’re ultimately supposed to be going in life and what’s going to be meaningful to you.

Melinda Wittstock:         Absolutely. And this applies to a business as well. We’ve been through a year where there’s not a business on the planet that didn’t have to pivot in some way, whether it was away from something because everything changed so quickly, or whether it was to seize an opportunity that hadn’t been there before. A lot of really kind of quick thinking, quick pivoting, and a lot of opportunity in that. But rapid relaunches going on there in a business context.

So when you’re working with entrepreneurs, Hilary, on taking their business to the next level, I’m mindful of what we’ve been talking about at a spiritual or soul level here or a personal development level or whatever language we want to put on it. What are some of the blocks that you’re seeing, particularly women business owners having at this kind of relaunch phase? What are some of the positives that you’re seeing about where women are placed right now to really take advantage of I think really kind of changing energy.

Hilary DeCesare:               There is a groundswell that is going on right now with an awakening. It is this awakening of women and business owners. And it has to do, and it has to stem with, and I really think that this is the magic behind the ReLaunch Co, is that we focus on the heart to the head to the higher self. And when a woman in a power role, CEO, entrepreneur, isn’t working with all three, there are points of failure. And when you start to say, all right, emotionally, how am I attached to this business? Not from the sense of letting your emotions get to you, but you are bringing in your feminine energy, you’re bringing in what naturally comes to us as women. And I do a ton of you know gender intelligence and the differences so that you understand your power.

And then you go to the head. And this is where a lot of times I’m like, Melinda, get out of your head, get out of your own head. But at the same time, you’ve got your prefrontal cortex that is all logical based, give me the steps. I want the steps of A to Z of how to run a successful business. But you’ve also got your subconscious brain which is that limiting beliefs, limiting beliefs.

So you’ve got to hit both of them. You’ve got to have those steps to create a successful foundation in your business. You got to understand time, team, money are the critical three, the elements that you must. You must become a smart savvy business leader. And then you go into that higher self. And the higher self is, if we know that universal laws out there, these truths, the law of attraction, the law of reciprocity, all of these things, they work, they work if you know how to harness them. Why wouldn’t we, if we want to reach that highest level, make sure that we are leveraging these things. Why aren’t we doing that? Because we haven’t been taught to do that.

For so many women, female CEOs, entrepreneurs, we have an idea, we immediately jump right in. But the core foundation of business, the business principles, are not there. And then we start to have success, we start to make a little money, we start to, okay, we’re going to grow, we’re going to go out, we’re going to do our next raise, blah, blah, blah, and we’re moving, moving. And all of a sudden, you’re like, crap, I don’t really know what I’m doing, I don’t really have that foundation, I don’t really understand the core. And I can’t go tell my board. I can’t go tell anybody else in the company.

So you create this atomic bomb inside of you that is literally self-defeating. It’s like it’s not helping you, it’s hurting you. So for those that are out there, I want you to tap in to the three H’s, the heart, the head, and the higher self. Think about it, as you’re going up your body, that circle back around, that’s half of the shape of a heart. And this is what it’s all about, trusting your intuition. Well, how do you do that? Too many people, we go through, in school, whether you’re in a business class or whether you’re not in a business class, whether you have an MBA or not, this stuff isn’t taught. And yet, it’s the most powerful. It’s when I see women executives reach their highest level, is when they are operating with all three.

Melinda Wittstock:         Absolutely. Gosh, so Hillary, we could talk for hours longer because I know you have this incredible backstory. I think of all your accomplishments and all the different companies you’ve built along the way. And you mentioned some of those kind of heart-wrenching moments that necessitated a relaunch. You’ll have to come back again to really-

Hilary DeCesare:               Melinda, that’s in my book. My book that I’m writing right now. It’s like the trials of a female CEO in the Silicon Valley. It’s like, oh, boy.

Melinda Wittstock:         Oh, man. I mean, that’s one of the reasons I launched this podcast because there were so few female mentors or women. And women are still getting 2% of the VC money. All these sorts of things. But gosh, that is a book I want to read, and you’ll have to come back on again. Talk to me about your vision of where you see yourself going in the next five years, 10 years, insofar as you can know.

Hilary DeCesare:               And as I said, I’m in the mid zone, and all of these experiences through, and I grew up in the corporate world at Oracle. You talk cutthroat, you talk the stories [inaudible 00:37:45]. You have that, and you have the multitude of companies that I’ve launched, the executives that I’ve helped coach, the startups that are like, I just want to create, I help those as well. I really feel like I am exactly where I should be. It is an accumulation of everything that I’ve learned, all of the background, all of the wonderful, amazing people that have come into my life.

And now, I just want to relaunch women out there into successful business. I want them to be able to scale, you mentioned right now about the 2%. Well, only 1% of women executives and entrepreneurs, CEOs actually get to seven figures.

Melinda Wittstock:         I know. Isn’t that insane?

Hilary DeCesare:               Yeah.

Melinda Wittstock:         That has to change.

Hilary DeCesare:               Why is that? It’s the three Hs. It’s the three Hs. You got to be bringing all of it in in order to do that. And so, that’s why right now, I’m living the dream. And by the way, my dad’s going in for a triple bypass next week. There’s a lot of life that still happens. And you’re hearing me right now like, I still feel like right now, because I have a solid foundation, I have the Relaunch foundation under me that it’s like, yeah, life’s going to happen, shit’s going to happen. There’s going to be another something tomorrow. But it’s how you approach it. It’s how you kind of let, you’re on that river of life, and you’re in your canoe, and the canoe is just this big light. And you realize you don’t have the paddles. And you just got to throw your arms up and say, all right, I’m on this ride. But it doesn’t have to be a struggle.

Melinda Wittstock:         Absolutely right. So Hillary, how can people find you and work with you? [inaudible 00:39:50] people listening to this who could certainly use your wisdom and insight and help?

Hilary DeCesare:               Well, first and foremost, because we’re all about podcasts, you can check me out on the Silver Lined Relaunch, and that would be the podcast. And then definitely head on over to therelaunchco.com, therelaunchco.com. And we’ve got a six months business course called the Fired Up Entrepreneur. We’ve got other courses and things you can sign up for the waitlist right there. You can hear all the podcasts, you can hear what we’re working on. We have a great Instagram so you can head over to the ReLaunch Co there as well.

Melinda Wittstock:         Wonderful. Well thank you so much for putting on your wings and flying with us today.

Hilary DeCesare:               Melinda, you are terrific. Thank you so much.

Melinda Wittstock:         Ah, thank you.

Hilary DeCesare
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